“It’s complicated”- it sounds a little funny, doesn’t it?
Married, single or in a relationship are compact, understandable and relatable terms.
“It’s complicated” when omitted into the air as a response, just results in raised eyebrows and hidden subtexts.
It’s a mystery saying something without really saying something.
People define “it’s complicated” in various terms, to some it can be a situation when you’re “with” someone, but you’re not really with them.
There are a number of reasons why we go via the “its complicated” route.
Whether it’s for money (Blesser vibes), trying to go undercover so that your folks don’t find out, trying not to appear too lonely to the world, or just going through an experimental phase.
The crux of the matter, is that it shouldn’t matter, because at the end of the day we are all different and we expect different things from relationships.
Related article: Does He Like You? (Here’s some mansplaining…)
The factor that truly complicates a relationship, is understanding that you can’t make it a success on your own.
You require your partner to reciprocate, to communicate and to do so honestly.
It take two to tango yeah?
Relationships aren’t always perfect like the love stories we see in movies. Relationships involve loads of effort, time, and commitment from both parties.
Maybe that’s why its easier to say “Its complicated”. The term comes with no commitment, no added tasks and responsibilities.
It’s a term that allows you to tango on your own, and then sometimes with the person of your choice…
There is no perfect equation for relationships.
Sometimes no matter how long you may be in a relationship with someone, the lines might not be completely defined, which can make things highly complicated.
TYI asked millennials what makes a relationship complicated and these were the responses:
1. Ethan: “Relationships don’t need to be complicated at all, it depends on the choices and decisions that a person makes which tends to lead to complicated situations. It depends on people’s emotions and what they are trying to get out of the relationship that makes things complicated.
2. Nadine: “50 Shades of grey made it complicated. It has ruined relationships because I expect a guy to live up to the character’s standard – Mr Grey.
The biggest problem that couples face is that they never communicate about their expectations in a relationship from the time they meet. We all want to be the perfect definition of love, however, this deception might lead to complications.”
3. Aphelele: “What makes a relationship complicated is not being honest with your partner, lack of communication and not being transparent.”
As awkward as it may sound, when you meet a person for the first time, before you take it any further and categorise them under Mr/ Ms Perfect, just make it perfectly clear with regards to what you want from a relationship, so that both parties are clear on the relationship objective.
At the end of the day, everyone has a choice, once you define your relationship expectations, it is up to the other person to choose whether they are comfortable with your relationship goals or not.
Let’s start on good habits for 2017, playing with people’s emotions must be left in 2016.
Don’t be that person that makes your partner’s life a living hell.
Join in the conversation:
What make a relationship “complicated”?