How do we unlearn brutality?

White nationalist demonstrators clash with counter demonstrators at the entrance to Lee Park in Charlottesville, Va., Saturday, Aug. 12, 2017. Gov. Terry McAuliffe declared a state of emergency and police dressed in riot gear ordered people to disperse after chaotic violent clashes between white nationalists and counter protestors. (AP Photo/Steve Helber)

White nationalist demonstrators clash with counter demonstrators at the entrance to Lee Park in Charlottesville, Va., Saturday, Aug. 12, 2017. Gov. Terry McAuliffe declared a state of emergency and police dressed in riot gear ordered people to disperse after chaotic violent clashes between white nationalists and counter protestors. (AP Photo/Steve Helber)more
Rescue personnel help injured people after a car ran into a large group of protesters after an white nationalist rally in Charlottesville, Va., Saturday, Aug. 12, 2017. The nationalists were holding the rally to protest plans by the city of Charlottesville to remove a statue of Confederate Gen. Robert E. Lee. There were several hundred protesters marching in a long line when the car drove into a group of them. (AP Photo/Steve Helber)more

The image of a girl bleeding through her nose after being battered by a fellow pupil at school is a hard one to understand and forget.

Unless we teach our young sons, nephews, male cousins and brothers that kicking, shoving or smacking their little sisters or anyone else is wrong, we will never win.

Unless we watch out for the symptomatic signs like a hawk and don’t entertain excuses, we are doomed.

More difficult to comprehend is how a man violently shoves and kicks a woman.

It compels one to ponder where the brutal nature was learnt and how it can be unlearnt. There have been many stories of relentless gender violence and how so many women never live to see what the future holds for them.

Yes, abuse against women is nothing new.

I recall a story about a man threatening to throw a TV set at his wife. I also remember how he sifted through bullets in his hands while his kids were in the next room.

I remember because I was one of those kids.

I prayed hard that my mother, siblings and I wouldn’t be reported one day as mere statistics of a familicide.

Someone once said we live in a society where some men are broken.

I don’t know if we can heal broken adult men, but we can certainly raise responsible future leaders who will never know a backhand.

* Mokati is a political writer for Independent Media.

The Star

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