What would you do if somebody told you that you could actually predict if your partner is the right one for you or not?
Sounds too good to be true right, but this can happen if you are aware and notice the red flags early in the relationship.
What are the red flags?
No matter how beautiful and in love they make us feel, relationships are complicated. They are unpredictable as you don’t know what really lies ahead.
As nice at it would be to be able to predict and analyse whether your partner is ‘the one for you or not’, the reality is that you can’t.
All you can do is pay attention to some subtle or not so subtle red flags.
Some users of the dating website Gleeden, who have faced this kind of situation numerous times in their lives, shared some of the signs to look out for in a relationship.
Complimenting too much and too often
Sure being complimented sounds sweet and lovey-dovey. It makes you feel good and confident about yourself. It also shows that your partner is thinking and this is just one of the ways to make you feel special. But complimenting too much and too often is a clear sign of obsession and might get creepy.
It may sound odd, but all this admiration may in fact not be completely real. If your partners are over-enthusiastic about you, then they are probably pushing to create an impression of ‘an ideal relationship’ image which is indeed fake. As soon as things don’t happen as per their expectations, this image will eventually dissolve and break both of you emotionally.
Sugarcoating is indeed a red flag in any relationship and 37.23 per cent of Gleeden users have confirmed the same. Interestingly about 23.73 per cent of them are aware of the fact that their partners are giving fake compliments to them to hide guilt or a deed that they have already committed.
Talking ill about their ex
Ex-relationships can be toxic and ex-partners can be traumatic. Talking bad about them is normal and healthy behaviour. However, if your partner completely ignores his/her mistakes and constantly blames their exes for every bad event that occurred or even for the separation, then this is a red flag that should certainly not be ignored.
It simply depicts that they are not ready to take accountability for anything that went wrong. Probably, they would do the same with you in the future as well. Always remember it always takes two to break a bond and just one of the partners can’t be blamed entirely for the relationship not working out.
Continuous bad mouthing someone who was related to your past is not a sign of a good human being irrespective of their gender and 35.89 per cent of Gleeden users have confirmed the same. Also, about 32.19 per cent of them say that if their partner cannot respect their past they won’t be able to do justice to their current relationship as well.
Disrespecting his/her family
Having family issues is indeed common. Being distant from family is one thing but being mean and disrespectful towards them is totally unacceptable.
If you notice that your partner misbehaves or disrespects his/her family, then this is your cue to step back and reconsider your relationship. It’s tough to start a relationship or build a family with a person who doesn’t treat his/her parents and loved ones with love, care, and empathy.
As the phrase goes; If you cannot be loyal to your parents, you cannot be loyal to anyone and 42.53 per cent of Gleeden users have voted in affirmation of the same. Interestingly, about 24.76 per cent of them are willing to help their partners learn family values despite all odds.
Cheated on their ex with you
This statement in itself is self-explanatory, if your partner cheated on his/her ex with you, then you never know the next to be cheated on is probably you. As the saying goes, ‘once a cheater, always a cheater’. So you won’t really be able to be with someone with whom you would be having major trust issues.
Cheating is a major red flag in any relationship and 44.23 per cent of Gleeden users have agreed on this statement whereas 31.45 per cent of them believe that a second chance shall only be provided to those who admit their cheating rather than being caught.
Invades your private space
Being in a healthy and happy relationship implies living in harmony where there is trust, love, care, support, and respect along with the right to maintain your personal privacy. Hence, if your partner asks for your passwords be it social media, phone, or financial apps, then he/she is certainly crossing the line and invading your private space.
There is a fine line between being close to someone and invading their personal space. In a relationship where two people are sharing their living space or are in continuous touch throughout the day, respecting each other’s personal space or ‘me’ time is the responsibility of every partner and 44.14 per cent of users have confirmed the same.
If someone invades this, it can lead to the downfall of the relationship according to users as 32.18 per cent of them have voted for the same.
The ones who try to change you
Being in a relationship does not mean losing your individuality or personal integrity. However, there are some toxic partners who would want to change you so that you can match up to their expectations.
This could be the way you dress, the friends you hang out with, the kind of profession you are in to even your physical appearance, body weight, style, etc.
This is another major sign that once you notice, you should bid goodbye and move on because a person with this nature would never be satisfied. Relationships are about accepting each other with their respective strengths and flaws. It’s about bringing out the best of each other, improving each other, and not changing your individualities.
Acceptance is important and that’s a fact approved by the Gleeden users as 42.10 per cent of them have voted for the same. Also, 32.14 per cent of them don’t mind compromising their habits that are not good for the family.
No person or relationship is perfect, in order to work things out, one needs to put in a lot of effort and make adjustments throughout the relationship.
While accepting the partner the way he/she is, is extremely important, certain behaviours are indeed red flags in the truest sense and should not be ignored.
Authored article courtesy Gleeden