JOHANNESBURG – We’ve been conditioned to try and fit into society since the blue and pink was chosen at our birth, all the way up to learning work etiquette. But what happens when you don’t fit it and when you become the butt of mean-spirited and judgmental jokes of people who point out your eccentric style, loud personality, or even your incorrect political opinions?
Psychologist Dr Kelly Neff, states that caring what people say and think boils down to the desire to be liked and accepted and worrying about people opinions makes us feel unworthy. Here are the four steps to help you NOT CARE WHAT OTHERS THINK OF YOU:
1. Understand why peoples opinions matter to you so much
What are the emotions you feel when someone praises you versus when they criticises you? These emotions could trigger you into trying to please people or change their opinion whether it’s for gratification of receiving praise or just to get them to stop talking about you.
2. Learn to let go of the control people have over you
The main problem with caring what others think is that you’re involving yourself in something you can’t control – other people’s opinion. You may have influence over it but you can’t make up someone’s mind
3. Focus on the positive
You are you and can’t be anybody else for a reason. By focusing on positivity and what you love it will help you appreciate and earn self reward of loving yourself over the reward of pleasing others before yourself.
4. Have confidence
Learning to love yourself and accept who you are is the long-term commitment needed to not care what people think of you. Do something everyday to remind you why you love yourself. This could be a creative hobby or something physical or endearing that makes you want to check yourself out in the mirror.